Richard Bach wrote 鈥渋f you love someone, set them free.鈥�
His mom, taking this saying to heart, saved Mike Miller from a lifetime of addiction and most likely death.
Today Miller is the clinical lead of The Cabin rehab centre in Chiang Mai, Thailand, helping addicts like himself conquer their demons.
The day before he spoke at a free clinic 鈥楬ow Addiction Affects Families鈥� on April 14 at the Fleetwood Community Centre, Miller stopped by the 91原创 Times office, where he opened up about his own struggles with drugs in Vancouver and on Vancouver Island 鈥� and how his mom鈥檚 tough love veered him on a path of sobriety.
Miller said the person who took the brunt of his addiction issues was the one he loved most 鈥� his mom.
鈥淪he was my chief enabler and she was rescuing me and doing all the things based on her fear and her obligation and guilt 鈥� those were the three motivating factors for her,鈥� Miller said.
鈥淪o when she would rescue me from the consequences, all it meant was she would take on those consequences. She would bail me out of jams, out of jail, out of whatever, and at the same time she was suffering.鈥�
Having a son as an addict affected Miller鈥檚 mom鈥檚 marriage and mental well-being.
鈥淪o she got all the consequences of my addiction and didn鈥檛 even get to get high,鈥� Miller said. 鈥淚 was the one who got to get high and forget about that stuff to some degree.鈥�
Miller says addiction touches a lot of people, but nobody ever tells people how to deal with it.
鈥淎ddicts don鈥檛 know about addiction. I mean, they live it but they don鈥檛 know anything about it and family members鈥� don鈥檛 know how to help their loved ones, so what they usually end up doing is helping the addiction to continue,鈥� Miller said.
His mom鈥檚 overprotective nature fueled Miller鈥檚 drug habit. She would pay his rent so he wouldn鈥檛 end up on the street. This opened a pathway for Miller to funnel his money towards drugs.
鈥淓very dollar that she gave me was a dollar I could spend on drugs,鈥� Miller said. 鈥淪he was doing it for what she will tell you is love 鈥� and I don鈥檛 doubt for a second that she loved me more than anything 鈥� but that wasn鈥檛 an act of love, it was an act of enabling. She was so fearful of what would happen if she didn鈥檛 take control and fix it.鈥�
Finally, Miller鈥檚 mom had enough.
鈥淭he very hardest thing my mother did in her whole life was tell me, 鈥業鈥檓 done, I鈥檓 not supporting you if you don鈥檛 get help,鈥欌�� Miller said. 鈥淎t which point my safety net was gone. It went against all her maternal instincts of unconditional love, I鈥檝e got to help my son no matter what. It was where she said, 鈥榶our consequences are coming fast and furious and you鈥檙e going to have to deal with them now because I鈥檓 not doing it anymore.鈥欌��
Within four days of his mom telling him that she was 鈥渄one,鈥� he was in treatment and he hasn鈥檛 used since.
鈥淭hat was absolutely the catalyst,鈥� Miller said. 鈥淲hen she took away the safety net, I said 鈥業鈥檝e got to stand on my own two feet, now.鈥欌��
Miller鈥檚 mom likely saved his life, judging from stats from the BC Coroners鈥� Service that show the deadly consequences of addiction.
In B.C., were 1,156 illicit drug overdose deaths with fentanyl detected in 2017, marking a 73 per cent increase over the number of fentanyl detected deaths (670) occurring in 2016.
Roughly 28 per cent of those dying in 2017 were aged 30 to 39, with 91 per cent between 19 and 59.
Fraser Health Authority had the highest number (377) of illicit drug overdose deaths with fentanyl detected in 2017, followed by Vancouver Coastal Health (337) and Interior Health Authority (200)
In 91原创, there were 32 fentanyl-detected deaths in 2017.
The crisis has spilled into 2018. There were 102 suspected illicit drug overdose deaths in February and the average number of illicit drug overdose deaths in February 2018 was 3.6 deaths per day.
Miller notes that the number of addicts is no higher than before, but with the potency of the stuff on the streets, the overdose count has risen substantially.
鈥淭he public perception of it right now is the opioid epidemic because of fentanyl and people dying and overdoses, and it鈥檚 tragic, but I don鈥檛 think there is more of an addiction problem now than there has been historically, it鈥檚 just more deaths because of it, so it鈥檚 getting more (media attention).鈥�
Helping families save the lives of loved ones, even if it鈥檚 one life, made the trip to his home country and province worth it for Miller. He said there were 鈥渓ots of families interested in the information that was presented and we received great feedback鈥� at the April 14 event.
鈥淭he fact that I鈥檝e lived through my addiction here and I鈥檓 clean now, if I can come and help anybody around here, then I鈥檓 motivated to do that because it鈥檚 home even though I鈥檝e lived in Thailand for a number of years,鈥� said prior to the seminar.
