Editor: 鈥橳was the night before Christmas, and all through B.C.
The pipeline wars were stirring, even over LNG
Liberal stockings were hung by the chimney with care
In hopes that Petronas soon would be there
The premier and cabinet were all snug in their beds
While visions of a debt-free B.C. danced in their heads.
And taxpayers in their 鈥檏erchiefs, and I in my cap,
Had just settled our bills for a long winter鈥檚 nap,
When on the Legislature lawn arose such a clatter,
We sprang from our stupor to see what鈥檚 the matter 鈥�
Quick as tax subsidies to TV shows like The Flash.
Why must these governments burn through all our cash?
The moon on the puddle on a street called Main,
Lit the people streaming off another stalled SkyTrain,
When what to my wondering eyes did I see,
But a TransLink executive in his luxury SUV,
With the $468,000 man throwing our money into the abyss,
I knew in a moment this must be Ian Jarvis.
More rapid than bus lines his enablers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name:
鈥淣ow, Greg Moore! Now, Cote! Now Walton and Gregor!
On, Jack Froese! On, Stewart! On, Brodie and Hepner!
Yet another TransLink tax! Grab the wallets of all!
Now waste away! Waste away! Waste away all!鈥�
Like leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
There were so many others with tax hikes to try;
Even on our properties the taxes they grew
Increases more than inflation, and new fees too 鈥�
All done, with nary an inkling of the strain we feel
When from our wallets hundred dollar bills they peel.
As I shook my poor head, and from my face rushed the blood,
In the mailbox came my MSP bill with a thud.
It was dressed as 鈥渋nsurance,鈥� from its head to its foot,
But it鈥檚 a tax and unfair and goes up every year to boot
So a growing $144 monthly bill breaks a taxpayer鈥檚 back,
Meaning less toys or hockey skates for kids in Santa鈥檚 pack.
These taxes 鈥� how they creep up! This burden we must carry!
All to pay half a million bucks for a guy to run BC Ferries!
A prime minister letting EI and CPP hikes flow,
And all those payroll taxes causing good jobs to go;
Reid and Kwan apologizing through gritted teeth,
All because they got caught spending beyond belief;
Governments and Crown CEOs, to the bar they belly
Why must there always be bad tax news on my telly?
They are chubby and plump, all of 鈥檈m jolly fat cats,
And we sighed when we saw them, hiding wallets under hats;
With a blink of their eye and a twist of their head
Our taxes shoot up, in more ways than we can dread;
A few bucks here, a few bucks there, that鈥檚 how they work,
And we who oppose them, they deem insolent jerks,
And again they come, laying their fingers into our pay packets,
So it鈥檚 up to taxpayers to yell no! Make a big racket!
Send them to find efficiencies and keep blowing the whistle,
Forcing 鈥檈m to save us the money by cutting the gristle.
Still we hear them exclaim, ere they drove out of sight 鈥�
鈥淗appy Christmas to all, and to all a bigger tax bite!鈥�
Jordan Bateman, B.C. Director,
Canadian Taxpayers Federation
